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If you didn’t see my last post, one of the reasons this blog wasn’t updated for nearly a year is because I simply couldn’t read. Events in my life left me unable to focus which left me sad as reading is something I usually do when I feel like I can’t do anything else.
That’s not to say I didn’t try. As a matter of fact, I went through nonfiction like they were giving out samples at Costco! And just because I haven’t finished anything doesn’t mean I don’t have thoughts. People who DNF have valid opinions too!
So here are a few snapshot reviews of the books I tried, mostly enjoyed, but ultimately have not finished during my hiatus.
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson
This book is a freaking godsend! No really. I teared up reading the first chapter because I felt so seen. I was the type of kid that would pride myself on being the only person to experience or feel a certain thing, which now that I type it out doesn’t make a ton of sense. Like, it made me tough and unique to be going through things that other people told me I wasn’t going through (i.e. gaslighting; not believing a child). In reality, it was actually a coping mechanism to deal with the loneliness and unbelievability of my situation, as well as the gaslighting I was experiencing from the adults in my life.
Gibson has put a name to what it felt like to live in a house where you had to grow up too fast, where the adults expected you to be able to handle the nuances of adult problems, and where, no matter how you felt, there was someone there telling you that you were wrong. I’ve bought my own copy and am taking this one at my own pace. This sort of experience is a lot to take in at once, but the way Gibson presents the information is so gentle yet matter-of-fact that I never felt overwhelmed by what she was sharing.
Paganism for Beginners: The Complete Guide to Nature-Based Spirituality for Every New Seeker by Althaea Sebastiani
[quick prayer to Freyja that my mother does not read my blog]
So, like many white Americans, I was raised Christian. When you’re raised in that culture there tends to be a lot you miss out on, especially when it comes to other religions.
When I started my breakdown of Christianity several years ago, one of the first things I decided to do was explore other beliefs. I literally had no information other than what I’ve been told by religious leaders which as you can imagine is worse than useless. It’s harmful. It wasn’t long before I learned witchcraft was not a religion but instead a practice, and Wicca was a religion with ties to witchcraft. I also learned that Wiccans are Pagans but not all Pagans are Wiccan. So I wanted a book that would explain the differences to me on a basic level while expanding my knowledge on nature-based spirituality in general.
And I found the perfect one!
PAGANISM FOR BEGINNERS is the perfect primer for those interested in learning more about this diverse religion. The author writes in a very informal but still informational way, acknowledging the diversity of practitioners and individual beliefs. From the history to the calendar, alters to rituals, this book was an amazing way for me to learn more about the world’s oldest religion. The book is explanative without being preachy which, for someone coming from a religion where all they do is tell you what to believe, is perfect.
The Magickal Family: Pagan Living in Harmony with Nature by Monica Crosson
Surprisingly enough this is a sort of memoir and parenting book. Do I have kids? No, but I was intrigued just the same. Especially how an entirely different religious and spiritual practice goes about raising children to appreciate their values and traditions.
I believe the author, Monica, is Wiccan and she narrates what it was like to raise her three children in a nature-based religion. I love the way she writes. She writes in a meandering style as she reflects on the last few decades, sharing the hardship of dealing with bigoted people to the joys of her daughter’s first blood moon party. What’s absolutely clear is how much she loves her children, and how their way of life brings her happiness.
Part of what makes this a parenting book are the spells, activities, and rituals sprinkled throughout. They’re centered around family and building a respect for nature in young ones. That’s also what makes this a sort of magical guide as well.
I’m not as far into this book as the others, but every book I’ve sampled from Llewellyn Publications has been a win.
The Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living by Meik Wiking
What is hygge? [pronounced: hyoo·guh] Well, that’s what THE LITTLE BOOK OF HYGGE is all about! In short, hygge is the Danish philosophy of comfort, togetherness, and well-being. It’s a feeling, a social culture, a decorating style, and a way of life. Essentially, this is the definitive book on how to live a comfy life.
And that isn’t the Danes bragging. This book was assembled by The World Happiness Institute. A group that literally studies what makes citizens happy and reports to the UN so different methods and mindsets can be adopted worldwide. Since Denmark is consistently voted the happiest country in the world by citizens, it makes sense that the Happiness Institute is based there.
This book has adorable illustrations and a mix of statistics and stories that share what exactly goes into making something hygge. You may be thinking, cozy blankets and warm lighting, and you’d be right! But it’s also the people you surround yourself with and the places you go.
I like how the author acknowledges that just because Danes are considered the happiest it doesn’t mean that they’re perfect. They specifically acknowledge that transplants report feeling very excluded due to Danes living in such tight communities, and how it can take years before the kind of bonds are formed that make you feel welcome. That kind of honestly took this from a how-to book on cozy living to a more honest analysis of happiness and culture.
Different, Not Less: A neurodivergent’s guide to embracing your true self and finding your happily ever after by Chloé Hayden
This is the one on this list I likely won’t finish, but I wouldn’t say that’s completely the book’s fault. The title really implied a guide, as in suggestions based on research and experiences, which is exactly what I was looking for. When I picked this up I was in the mood to learn more about autism from someone else with the same neurocondition. In a way I did, but not in the way I was looking for.
See, this is actually a memoir, and while you can certainly pick up tips and ideas from reading about another’s experiences, Chloé and I’s experience with autism just didn’t overlap in most ways.
Now I definitely think this is a book that neurotypicals would benefit from reading. Chloé’s story about going to an Australian school while autistic really broke my heart. I am so angry on her behalf that this level of abuse was allowed to occur within her school system without any legal repercussions. In my experience a lot of people dismiss the harm they do as adolescents, reading about how it was experienced by those who were bullied could open a lot of eyes to the long-term damages.
That being said, Chloé’s special interests and her experience with autism are vastly different from my own. To the point I genuinely could not relate. While I can see the similarities in our thought processes, a lot of the writing felt infantilizing which is triggering for me.
I’m really glad Chloé is doing well but this is not a book for me.
What I Mean When I Say I’m Autistic: Unpuzzling a Life on the Autism Spectrum by Annie Kotowicz
Out of all the books I read on neurodivergence during these six months this was my absolute favorite. Author Annie has a blog, Neurobeautiful, where she elaborates on her experiences as an autistic woman getting diagnosed as an adult and what it was like growing up without the diagnosis to explain how her mind works.
She perfectly explains what it means to be autistic from our perspective! From stimming to navigating relationships to learning about ourselves, Annie gives examples from her own life and her thought process in those moments which is so important for explaining the autistic experience.
It can be incredibly hard living in a world that isn’t built for you, and it’s not as if we can pick up and go somewhere we belong. To unaccepting neurotypicals, we’re seen as oddities disrupting their idea of the way people should be. No one ever takes the time to learn the beautiful ways our minds work.
I love this book! I can’t think of another book on the autistic experience where I felt so thoroughly seen. Annie just speaks to me on another level. This book is a short novella, just over 100 pages, and absolutely worth the read.
I’ll post full reviews when I actually finish these! Lately I’ve felt a faint pull, something calling to me from the dark. Perhaps my slump is over for I hear the books calling to me…